How many times have we all heard the same sad story in the media..
A story of lost loves, loved ones left and devastation left behind, some stories are more difficult to hear than others.
Such as the one I am about to tell you about, it touched my heart significantly and I and those involved feel the need to have the experience shared. It involves people that are a beacon of light for those that are experiencing the same type of loss.
As a Psychic Therapist I have the sad task at times of dealing with some of the most heart felt situations one being the case of Suicide. Unintentional or not, it is evident that someone that departs from this earth in such a manner stamps a hard mark on those persons left behind and causes a huge ripple effect on the life of those loved ones.
The loss is huge and regardless of what anyone says, the feelings felt however some may say that it will get easier with time, it is in my opinion without question an eternal feeling.
The feelings of being left behind, not knowing why and the reason for it all happening, the guilt of what if I had done this and that.. well it makes things all the more difficult. I relate it to a feeling that may lighten into calm soft waves over time that gently touch ones psyche but at difficult times its like a tidal wave pushing every memory, feeling to the forefront and drowning ones soul.. Its constant, it does not go away and will forever effect the person left behind in so many ways.
This type of loss is unfathomable, incomprehensible and no one really understands unless ones has themselves experienced it.
Therapist get so many families , individuals walking through their office door with the same loss, like a huge stone sitting upon their shoulders like a weight no one person can carry.
I get those types of case files at times and I also feel the weight, its inevitable.
Some are not so difficult as others but in all when dealing with Suicide the approach is with caution, sensitivity, understanding and above all love.
The case I wish to share with you, is not just about displaying the family concerned, their loss, its a story of ones ability to handle and how they are coming to terms with it and how they live with the pain of having someone taken from them at a time when NOONE is ready.
Full permission has been given by the family concerned, as they wish for their voice to be heard and their hearts desire to provide a beacon of light for those placed in such similar situations.
This is their story..
Amy and Leonel were married in August 25th 2001, after year of their first meeting. Their marriage stood strong, on asking anyone about Amy and Leonel’s marriage the response I was given was that this union had the type of marriage we all dream of.
One of deep love, affection and strong commitments. Both Leonel and Amy have friends and family, both are well loved.
Leonel, a hard worker, constantly working hard to provide his family, building himself a successful livelihood for his family.
Amy, a wonderful and supporting wife, with equally strong family values and deeply committed to maintaining a strong supportive family.
They both over the next 11 years had three children 10, 9 ,7, children that have been strongly raised with the same deep set family values, close knit and very supportive, well behaved and lovely children.
What happened on the night of October 8, 2012 will forever be etched in the minds of those concerned and will prove to have a ripple effect on not only those close to the family of Amy and Leonel but will forever be part of my life also.
On October 8, 2012, Leonel arrived home after a regular hard days work, walked into the bedroom of his home and with his wife Amy in the kitchen and his children watching TV and doing homework, Leonel picked up the gun from under his mattress and a shot was fired and suddenly the family unit of 5 became 4.
This sad case was not brought to my attention until the day I arrived at the home of Amy and Leonel, in July 2013. It was a my normal day of Psychic readings and upon reaching their home this reading was supposed to be the same. However something was different. I arrived with my own daughter as company and as we were parking outside of their home both herself we began to discuss how we did not feel comfortable entering the home? We sat for a moment both wondering why this house? why this feeling had come over us?
I am no stranger to sad, darker and negative feelings, I have been Psychic for over 25 years, using it in many forms thought-out my life and work to aid myself and those I come into contact with. This was nothing new but this one caused me to step back a little.
Never the less I proceeded, my daughter however sat outside playing with the little boy that was in the garden, that became very interested in our arrival.
I met Amy for the first time that day, a beautiful girl, her personality washed over me.. An old soul, very connected I thought as we began the session.
The session began with feelings of high energy but there was still this darkness, redness that seemed to linger from somewhere, it stood back from me that’s the only way I could explain it, like a force a feeling sitting at a distance but there. It was evident to both myself and my daughter that something bad had happened here, a warning sign of red always appears in my mind at times like this, this sign was especially red..
Amy sat in front of me and said nothing, just proceeded to choose her cards from the tarot deck accompanying me.
Of course the cards made things especially clearer as the reading went along, the sad story of Leonel appeared. Nothing could have prepared me for the sadness, the love and the heart felt desperation of one that is in such turmoil and despair. I believe between Amy and myself the tears fell for over an hour.
I should say that I do not need the Tarot cards all the time, as at times I can read someone without them. My psychic ability has never failed me in such cases, I have located missing persons, found missing items, solved stagnant cases and provided my services numerous times in effort to help those that have unsolved questions.
However I have found that when someone takes the time to actually touch the tarot cards with their energy the cards speak to me sometimes more quickly, clearer and with such a force that I cannot explain it or tell you how or why they work in the way they do, but they just do.
In this case of Amy and Leonel it worked in the same way as most, as Amy chose the cards, Leonel’s spirit began to speak directly through the cards, like a conduit for electricity, the cards provide the vessel for his spirit to talk. He was not to be ignored.
Over the course of an 8 week period Amy has grown, her family has grown in strength, not only in hope and understanding but with their views that there is a life after death.
Amy and her family through my Tarot Therapy have discovered a way to heal as much as possible, answer some very tough unanswered questions and get a deeper understanding of why things happen the way they do.
I now sit after working with Amy and her family reflecting and thinking of this very special family. I see Amy stronger and more resilient that the person I met in July, her children that are now adjusting as well as they can given the circumstances and that are now beginning to enjoy their live with a deeper understanding that will carry them into their future.
I leave you with my thoughts on this case.
The fact that Amy chose this avenue, reached out and contacted me tells me one thing, that as a Psychic Investigators and Psychic Tarot Practitioners we are being more and more sought after in the efforts to solve and heal, this case is not exception..
Amy wrote :
Wow tears! You could not have said it better. Before you came into my life I was in a very dark place. I did not understand why this had happened why this happened to the most loving caring hard working husband and father that I know.
I always felt Leonel around especially on the very hard days. I knew he was the one getting me through this, however I just did not know how to “Connect” with him or if I was really feeling him.
At times I would think that maybe I was just going crazy from all the sadness.
I have always felt that what happened was a accident, I know that some would say that I was in denial of how things were but things just did not add up.
There was no problems in our family, in our marriage, no money problems or work problems. I just could not understand and I could not put the pieces together.
I was in a very dark place for that reason. Missing my husband my best friend, my everything.
I myself even had many thoughts of committing suicide I just wanted to be with him so much, I know that no-one can really understand why I would be thinking like this knowing what this sad event has just put my family through.
Here I now am, I have three children, so how could i think like that?
Well truth is my children are the only things that kept me living.
Until I meet with Shazz, I knew that the reading would give me some answers but I had no ideal it would save my life. Because of the readings I now understand what happened, that it was a accident and even though my husband is not physically here with me he will always be with me in spirit.
The reading confirmed for me that I am not crazy from the sadness and that he, Leonel is still with me and always has been with me and always will be in spirit.
I know that Leonel will be waiting for me when my time comes. I now realize that the bond between two souls can never be broken.
If it was not for the Tarot Therapy Cards and my lovely friend Shazz I probably would not be here today, the reading helped my wonderful husband Leonel come through to me, by letting me know he will always and forever be here with me. Shazz and the cards have helped heal my soul, she is a doctor for the soul it gets no better then that. I am truly blessed to have found her.
The anniversary of my Leonel passing is upon me, I still miss him deeply, think of him daily sometimes hourly but its just a little bit easier knowing he’s around me and I know he always will be.
In loving memory of Leonel July 9, 1980 – October 8, 2012
Fully Copy write, September 21, 2013.. Shazz The Psychic Practitioner
I have to say after meeting Amy, witnessing her strength and family duty to her children only give me more and more strength and commitment to helping those in such need, the Tarot has become my friend and confidant as well as my insight. I am forever grateful for its trust in me.
On writing this article hopefully it will enlighten and assist those that are in possibly the same emotional position or that of something similar to maybe realize that it is not wrong to seek help from an Alternative and Unconventional method as some would like us to believe, it is not wrong only different and its what works that matters most.
Amy and her wonderful family have grown in strength and commitment to living strong and moving on but never forgetting and continually forgiving..
Amy and her family and I have remained close friends since our first meeting, we talk often and many times I look back on our first meeting, admiring her continued growth since such an difficult time as an individual and admire their strength as a family.
Amy and many others like her give me the drive and desire to carry on with my passion for the work I do and how it helps people.
Thank you Amy for your trust, friendship and faith in the Alternative x